


Such Selfish Prayers

by smaragdbird



Category: Whitechapel (TV)
Genre: Getting Together, Gift Giving, M/M, Mutual Pining, Pining, Secret Admirer, Team Feels
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-12
Updated: 2018-08-12
Packaged: 2019-06-26 11:20:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,031
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15662217
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/smaragdbird/pseuds/smaragdbird
Summary: Kent has a secret admirer and suddenly starts finding small gifts on his desk at work. He thinks it's Mansell playing a prank but Mansell denies it so the whole team (being detectives) decide to investigate and figure out who it could be.There's only one person who Kent wants it to be though.





	Such Selfish Prayers

**Author's Note:**

> Written for [this ](https://whitechapel-itv.livejournal.com/47602.html?thread=868594#t868594) prompt

Kent stared at the chocolate bar that was sitting on his desk. Thankfully the chocolate bar did not stare back but it also did not divulge why it was there. It was right in the middle of his desk, in line with the rest of his things so there was no way someone had just accidentally dropped it there. It was also a little fancier than what you would get from the vending machine so someone had not only put it there deliberately but also brought it in from outside work. 

Carefully, in case it was not what it seemed to be, Kent picked up the chocolate. If it was a prank someone had taken great care to re-wrap the chocolate since the paper wrapping was not even a little crinkled or out of place and the seal unbroken.

He looked around as he turned the chocolate over in his hands, uncertain what to do. Riley was making a cup of tea, Miles was typing a report at his desk and Chandler was in his office. That only left – 

“What have you got there?” Mansell asked, giving him a friendly nudge in the side.

“Someone left this on my desk”, Kent replied, showing him the chocolate and watching for his reaction.

“Fancy”, Mansell replied, wrinkling his nose. “Not a huge fan of dark chocolate though.”

“I am”, Kent said. It was even the kind that had chili in it, which was his favourite.

“Well, good for you then”, Mansell grinned and made his way over to Riley.

Kent gave the chocolate one last look, then shrugged and stowed it in his bag. If it was a prank he wouldn’t set it off in front of everyone and if it was one, then he had a nice bar of chocolate to enjoy at home.

/

The pen appeared a week later. The chocolate had been exactly what it had appeared to be and Kent had slowly eaten it piece by piece to make it last for longer.

His own pen had been leaking lately, leaving ink stains on his fingers and he had meant to replace it soon but just hadn’t gotten around to it yet.

Just like the chocolate the pen was sitting in the middle of his desk and it was even within its own small case. Looking over his shoulder Kent narrowed his eyes at Mansell who was either really good at pretending to be oblivious as he was scrolling through something on his computer or he actually was. Mansell liked to watch when people fell for his pranks, but it was possible that he had just gotten better at this. The whole thing reeked of a prank and that usually meant Mansell was involved.

This time it was Riley who noticed his gift. “That’s a nice pen”, she said as she dropped off some files about their last case that he needed to co-sign on his desk. “Got it as a gift from someone?”

Since it was still sitting in its box it was pretty clear that Kent hadn’t bought it himself.

“Maybe”, he replied. “Could be a prank.”

“From whom?” She asked. When he looked in Mansell’s direction, she sighed. “I thought you two had made up and everything.”

“You know how he is”, Kent replied evadingly. “He finds these kinds of things funny.”

“But he hasn’t asked you about the pen yet?” 

Kent shook his head.

“Then it’s not him, you know how impatient he is”, she said, patted his shoulder and left. 

She had a good point, so Kent finally opened the little box and took the pen out. It was sleek and black and fit nicely into his hand. It seemed a little more expensive than what he would have spent on a pen and for a moment he cast a hopeful look in the direction of Chandler’s office door. 

A part of him wanted to imagine that Chandler had gifted him the pen, the chocolate, too. But in reality he should finally start to accept that Chandler would never think of him in that way and learn to move on.

/

A week later a package of tea was sitting on his desk. It even had a little bow on it but that might have been because they were inching towards Christmas and nearly all shops were starting to decorate. It was a very nice box too, made from wood, and engraved with the name and the logo of the manufacturer. The tea inside was loose, not in teabags, and smelled a little of bergamot and citrus oil. Earl Grey, his favourite, though like everyone else Kent was usually drinking the 500 bags for 5 quid stuff that piled up in the kitchen. 

“Definitely not a prank”, Riley decided after she had taken a sniff of the tea. “Smells nice, nice and expensive.”

“It seems you have a secret admirer”, Buchanan said when he stopped by and saw the box of tea on Kent’s desk. “This is your third gift now I heard?”

Kent was not surprised that Buchanan knew about his gifts. Cases had been thankfully slow lately and gossip travelled with the speed of light. 

“First the chocolate and then the pen”, he confirmed.

“Any idea who it might be?” Riley’s eyes sparkled.

Kent shrugged. “I’m still not convinced that it’s not some kind of prank.”

“It’s not me, mate”, Mansell replied. “Playing a long con is not my style.”

“Is there a team meeting I wasn’t invited to?” Miles asked as he came into the office. 

“We are trying to solve the mystery of young Kent’s secret admirer”, Buchanan replied and of course Miles’ interest was hooked immediately. 

“You’ve got an admirer, since when?” Miles asked with a grin. “And who is it?”

“We ruled out Mansell”, Riley said.

Miles rolled his eyes. “Great work.”

“As this is the third gift in as many weeks, everything points towards someone who started working here recently”, Buchanan said. “Or someone who only came across Kent in the last weeks.”

Miles tilted his head. “Doesn’t leave many options unless you’ve been making eyes at one of the delivery boys.”

“I haven’t been making eyes at anyone”, Kent muttered and put the box of tea in his desk drawer.

/

The next gift was fittingly enough a mug and not just any mug, it had the name of Kent’s favourite band on it. He didn’t know whether to be charmed that someone was paying such close attention to him or creeped out.

“We could dust it for prints”, Miles suggested when the whole team minus Chandler gathered around Kent’s desk to admire his latest gift. “See if something comes back from the system.”

“What, you think a criminal has been leaving gifts for Kent?” Riley asked, clearly amused by the idea.

“We had two mob bosses pose as construction workers, remember? And a cleaning lady who drove nails into our pipes”, Miles pointed out.

“And we all know the gangsters go for the pretty and innocent ones”, Mansell joked, cuffing Kent over the head, who pushed back out of habit.

“Maybe you could leave a note for them”, Buchanan suggested. “They might reveal themselves if they’re encouraged by your interest.”

“But I don’t know who they are, so I don’t know if I’m interested or not”, Kent pointed out. Chandler was the only person he was interested in and the least likely candidate at the same time. 

“But then you can let them down gently”, Riley picked up the thread. “Not a bad idea, Ed.”

“Thank you, Meg.”

“I still think we should check for prints”, Mansell replied and tried to grab Kent’s new mug but Kent put his arm around it protectively.

“They’re not a criminal”, he said fiercely, suddenly feeling protective of his secret gift giver. 

/

The next week saw him and the whole team investigating another gruesome serial killer that had them all stay overnight. Kent spent hours watching the cctv footage of their crime scenes without finding anything. It was as if the killer could turn themselves invisible. 

Since he had spent all night at his desk he didn’t think that he would get a gift this week. Whoever it was who was leaving the gifts on his desk was too likely to be discovered.

However, when he came back after making himself a cup of tea, the nice tea in the new mug, there was a small book lying on his desk. It was properly bound and closed with a piece of string like something one might find in an expensive bookshop. The title revealed it to be a volume of poetry.

Curiously he opened it to see what kind of poetry it was. There was an index of authors at the front together with the titles of the poems. Just going by that it was already clear that it was a collection of love poems. It seemed there was a romantic intent behind these gifts and Kent didn’t know whether to be relived or scared.

“I didn’t know you were a fan of poetry”, Chandler said when he stopped by Kent’s desk to ask for an update of the security camera footage.

“It’s a gift”, Kent replied, feeling self-conscious about it. Chandler wasn’t one to follow the office gossip but Miles might have told him about the gifts. Or maybe, since he was usually the first one at work, he already knew who had been leaving gifts on Kent’s desk.

“It’s a good choice”, Chandler replied before following up on the cctv footage and it did not occur to Kent ask how he could know that. Although most likely Chandler had the same volume on his bookshelf and Kent tried not to feel bitter as he wondered if Chandler’s had been a gift, too.

/

In the following week he tried to write a note to his gift-giver but every attempt ended up crumbled in the bin. He didn’t know whether to reject or encourage his unknown admirer. And there was still the possibility that someone was having a laugh at him.

So instead he held back and waited for the next gift if there would be one. Maybe whoever it was, was fed up with his indecisiveness and had given up. Riley, Mansell and Miles had teased him mercilessly about the book of love poetry but at home Kent had read it cover from cover. He had tried not to imagine Chandler doing the same, maybe even reading his favourite parts out loud.

Every now and then over the past years he had tried to get over his crush on Chandler since it was not going to go anywhere. His attempts had always wavered between going on a date or getting a transfer and in the end, he had done neither.

Maybe this was his chance. Maybe he could try something new like forging a connection with someone who seemed to genuinely care about him. 

The next gift was a ticket to the opera for Friday night. It was for the Barber of Sevilla, a comedy as far as Kent knew. 

“Oh, fancy”, Mansell grinned when he saw the ticket and dangled it between his fingers.

“Are you going to go?” Riley asked just as Kent snatched it back.

“Yes, I think so”, Kent replied. It was the least he could do. If the other person was not someone he wanted to date, he should turn them down face to face and not by simply not showing up.

“What is it this time?” Miles asked, who had just come out of Chandler’s office. For a moment Kent could see Chandler through the opened door and noticed that Chandler was looking right at them.

“An opera ticket”, Mansell pretended to flatter himself. “Very posh.”

“You’re going, right?” Miles made it sound more like a demand than a question.

“Yes, I’m going”, Kent affirmed. He looked down at the ticket again. The showing was late enough that he could go home and change beforehand unless something came up.

“Good”, Miles’ tone made all three of them look at him. “I’ll make sure you’re free on Friday night.”

Riley tilted her head. “You know who it is, don’t you?”

“Come on, tell us”, Mansell asked but Miles shook his head.

“That’s between them and Kent. He can tell you next week if he wants.”

Miles not only knowing but seemingly also approving of whoever was giving him gifts was both reassuring and not. After all he had been the one to push Chandler towards Morgan Lamb as well and Kent still wasn’t entirely convinced that she hadn’t been working with the murderer.

He took the ticket and slipped it carefully into the back of his phone case. Now all he had to do was to wait for Friday evening to come.

/

Thankfully there was no gruesome murder that needed their attention at the last minute. There wasn’t even an ordinary Friday night stabbing, though Miles, Riley and Mansell had all promised to cover for him should something come up.

They had also all tried to give him dating advice over the last day, varying from the clothes he should wear to the best way of letting someone down nicely in case he wasn’t interested. Even Erica had texted him encouraging messages though he hadn’t told her about the gifts but Mansell probably had.

“You’re heading home early?” Chandler asked as Kent was packing his bag. It wasn’t early per say but usually Kent stayed behind for a bit just like Chandler.

“Yes, sir, I have opera tickets for tonight”, Kent had almost said he had a date but decided not to in the last moment.

“What are you going to see?” Chandler asked. His tone was perfectly even and polite, putting a final nail to the coffin that was Kent’s hope that his secret admirer was Chandler.

“The Barber of Sevilla”, Kent replied.

“It’s a good choice”, Chandler said. “It’s funny. You’ll like it.” He smiled at Kent for a moment and Kent did not want to go on his date. He did not want anyone but Chandler and the ache in his chest felt ready to explode and he reminds himself that Chandler’s momentary smiles were not worth passing up a chance at happiness. “You’re going with your sister?”

“No, I…I have a date”, Kent said and watched for Chandler’s reaction. For a moment it seemed as if something akin to relief passed over Chandler’s face and Kent could’ve cried. 

“Have a good weekend, Kent.”

“You, too, sir.” He waited until Chandler was back in his office, the door firmly closed, before he allowed himself to feel crushed. He had always known this was the inevitable outcome and yet the reality of the rejection hurt.

“Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do”, Mansell said, slapping his shoulder and Kent was glad for the excuse to glare at someone, anyone.

“That gives me blank card”, he replied but Mansell only laughed.

“Text Erica when you get back”, he added, swiping crumbs from his desk. “She’s worried you’re going out with a serial killer.”

“Wonder who gave her that idea?” Kent replied sarcastically.

“You’re the one who didn’t want your gifts dusted for prints”, Mansell retorted. “Don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

“I’ll be fine”, Kent said, slinging his bag over his shoulder. He would need to pick up his suit from the dry cleaner before he went home.

“Text her anyway”, Riley advised him from her desk and gave him an encouraging smile. “Though I’m sure they’ll be lovely.”

“Off with you, Kent”, Miles barked. “I don’t want to see you until Monday morning.”

Even if the date ended in a disaster he knew that his team would have his back.

/

Even in his best suit Kent felt terribly out of place, waiting in the opera foyer, which didn’t help his nervousness at all. The warm lights created a bright but inviting atmosphere in the beige and gold and vermillion painted hall. People were milling around, looking at their programs or chatting with each other but no one was paying any attention to him. 

No one had looked familiar so far but Kent had reasoned with himself that it had to be someone from work. A serial killer probably wouldn’t have lured him into a public building and for a joke this seemed too expensive.

He took a deep breath and wondered if he should get a drink to calm his nerves.

“Emerson.” He nearly jumped when he heard his name, especially since the voice sounded very, very familiar. He turned around and found himself face to face with Chandler, looking heartbreakingly beautiful in his tuxedo.

“Sir?” He asked because this couldn’t be, this had to be some kind of coincidence or a joke or – 

“I’m glad you decided to come”, Chandler said, sounding absolutely sincere. “I wasn’t sure you would considering how clandestine this whole set up was.”

“You…you left the gifts on my desk?” Kent asked because he needed to be absolutely sure that this was not some mistake or misunderstanding.

“I did”, Chandler confirmed and Kent’s hopes were so high that they might kill him. “I know I should’ve been more direct but I didn’t want to put pressure on you since we work together. If you want we can just treat this as a night out between friends.”

“We are not friends”, Kent blurted out before he could stop himself and saw the light in Chandler’s eyes go out. “I don’t want us to be friends. I want you. I hoped it was you even though I knew I shouldn’t hope because it was so unlikely. You have to know that I’m in love with you. There is no way you cannot know that.”

Chandler looked down and Kent realised that he had probably gone too far. This was just meant to be a date and not…this. “I wasn’t sure.”

He swallowed. “And now?”

“I am.” Chandler looked him in the eyes, a smile on his face, warm and bright, and held out his hand.

Kent laughed and almost cried at the same time as he took it.

**Author's Note:**

> Find me [ here](http://smaragdbird.tumblr.com/) on tumblr


End file.
